It’s safe to say that reaching financial independence is a common goal for a lot of adults. However, many factors can interfere with it or keep people from achieving it, such as health issues, job losses, failing businesses, and other various personal difficulties.
One forum user, nicknamed Mochachoc, shared that she had successfully reached financial independence. That is, until her health declined and she was forced to start from scratch. During such a difficult time, she turned to her long-distance boyfriend for help. For a while, his aid was sufficient, but over time she needed more, which he refused to give. Helpless, she turned to netizens, asking if she was being unreasonable.
People who reached financial independence might lose it for various reasons
Image credits: Liza Summer / pexels (not the actual photo)
For this woman, it was her health that pushed her to lean on her boyfriend for support, who overtime became hesitant to give her money
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska / pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Mochachoc
A third of all women rely on their partner financially
YouGov data in 2021 showed that in many couples, around a third of all women rely on their partner financially, even if they work full-time. Meanwhile, only 11% of men are completely reliant on their other half, meaning that money issues strike less often in the male population.
As females are more financially dependent, this also means they’re more likely to be in a worse position with money if their marriage or relationship ends. 35% of women with a partner say that they wouldn’t manage well if they suddenly split up. This number rises to 59% for women who are already financially dependent on their significant other. Even though men experience this as well, the figure is lower, with around 17% of them saying they wouldn’t do well at all if they broke up with their partner.
A person can become money-reliant on their other half when they step into the role of a stay-at-home parent who takes care of children and their home in exchange for financial support from their partner. The dependent individual may also have a physical disability that prevents them from working. In addition, the partner might have been encouraged to quit their job when their significant other is in a good enough financial situation where they don’t have to be employed.
As long as this situation doesn’t become a source of power, guilt, or disagreement, the relationship shouldn’t suffer. However, such arrangements are often viewed in a negative light as they prevent financially dependent people from leaving if the relationship goes awry. Without their partner, they don’t have a source of income for basic needs and no savings to fall back on.
Dependence can bring up resentment and guilt in a relationship as the earner starts to feel burdened
Moreover, after a while, dependence can bring up resentment and guilt in a relationship, as the earner might start to feel burdened. There’s also a risk that the person with the funds will try to exert control through money and limit what the financially supported person does. Likewise, the dependent may give up their own interests to avoid financial conflict.
If you aren’t dissatisfied with your relationship, it’s the perfect time to make positive changes and strengthen your personal finances for the future. When the couple is ready to make the partnership more financially equal, seeking financial advice can make all the difference. The advisor will look at the shared income, savings, and assets and determine a plan to go from there.
Learning to be more financially literate might also help you make better money decisions. It can be improved by reading books, listening to podcasts, or taking finance classes at the local community center or online. Becoming more financially literate can increase a person’s confidence to take over their life and financial future.
In cases where financial dependency is a concern in a partnership, it’s important for couples to openly communicate any feelings surrounding it. This can help build trust and create more supportive and understanding relationships with a partner and finances as well. As a result, they might be even more motivated to help each other’s financial situation.
Readers thought the woman was wrong to accuse her boyfriend of financial abuse 
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