The fact that you've clicked this article means one of two things: You're either a Wizards fan who knows exactly where this post is going or you're simply trying to figure out how on earth a team that hasn't won anything of significance since Jimmy Carter was president could possibly influence the outcome of the NBA Finals. Moreover, you're also probably trying to figure out what bozo wrote this.
It turns out it's me. I'm the bozo. Yes, I'm a Wizards fan. And, no, it doesn't bring me any joy writing this.
But it's true. If past results are any indication, the Indiana Pacers are about to win the NBA Finals. And it's all thanks to a curse put upon the Wizards by the cruel Basketball Gods themselves.
Every season for the last seven years, a former Washington Wizard has won an NBA championship after leaving the team.
- 2017-2018 Golden State Warriors: Shaun Livingston, JaVale McGee
- 2019 Toronto Raptors: Jodie Meeks
- 2020 Los Angeles Lakers: JaVale McGee, Dwight Howard, Markieff Morris
- 2021 Milwaukee Bucks: Bobby Portis
- 2022 Golden State Warriors: Gary Payton II, Otto Porter, Chris Chiozza
- 2023 Denver Nuggets: Kentavious Caldwell-Pope, Jeff Green, Ish Smith, Thomas Bryant
- 2024 Boston Celtics: Kristaps Porzingis
Considering how things are going, it's reasonable to assume that part of the requirement for winning a championship is to have a former Wizard of some sort.
Looking up and down the rosters for both teams, the Thunder don't have a single former Wizards player on their side. But the Pacers? The Pacers have two: Thomas Bryant and Quenton Jackson.
One of two things is about to happen in these Finals: Either the Thunder break this curse and free the Wizards from their miserable fate of being the physical embodiment of "Good Luck Chuck" in an NBA team or the Indiana Pacers are about to win their first NBA title.
I know what I'm rooting for here.
This article originally appeared on For The Win: The Pacers will win the NBA Finals because of the Washington Wizards (really)