Parenting is a very contentious topic. Pretty much anyone you ask will have quite strong opinions on how best to raise children. At times, this can lead to fierce arguments online and in real life between people who mean well and have good intentions. 

Social media user @HonestLeYo started a massive discussion on X (formerly Twitter) after asking everyone to spill the tea about their most honest and slightly controversial opinions on parenting. Scroll down to see what they had to say. 

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The X thread was a resounding success and reached many people all over the social network. At the time of writing, user @HonestLeYo’s entire discussion was viewed a whopping 65.4 million times. It just goes to show how much people care about the topic of parenting as a whole. It’s a topic that’s very relatable and close to many internet users’ hearts.

For every opinion on parenting, no matter how thought out and reasonable it might sound, there’s always going to be someone who’s going to counter it with their own take on things. People can have very wildly different perspectives and experiences in life. It’s no different where raising kids is concerned. Something that seems to work for one family might miss the mark in another home.

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If you have kids, then you know that how you approach childcare might be different from how your relatives, friends, coworkers, and neighbors do it. There are four main styles of parenting: authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and neglectful.

You might find that you fit one category very neatly or you’re a mix of two. However, they’re not all built equal.

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Though every family and child is indeed different, there are some things that all parents can do that are fundamentally sound. To put it very simply, research shows that it’s authoritative parents who raise the happiest, most confident, well-adjusted, independent, and well-educated kids.

Meanwhile, authoritarian, permissive, and neglectful parenting styles are severely lacking and can lead to serious issues down the road.

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Broadly speaking, authoritative parenting is about finding a balance between rules, boundaries, support, and love. It highly prizes open and honest communication, transparency, structure, as well as familial warmth.

Authoritative parents set very clear rules and expectations for their kids, but they also take their thoughts and feelings into account. It’s a great blend of discipline, fairness, and guidance. 

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However, authoritative parenting doesn’t simply happen in a vacuum. It requires a lot of time, energy, and patience to get it right. It means slowing down and explaining to your child why you have the rules that you have for behavior at home and in public. It means enforcing those same rules to show that misbehavior has consequences.

And it means constantly communicating with your munchkin throughout everything so that their feelings aren’t ignored. It’s a lot of work. But it’s worth it in the end.

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The alternatives are easier to implement because they require less effort on the parent’s part, but the results aren’t as good.

For example, authoritarian parents may set clear rules, but they simply expect their kids to obey them without taking their opinions or feelings into account. It’s all strictness without the support. And there’s too much focus on punishment than warmth.

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Permissive parenting, on the other hand, is the polar opposite of authoritarian parenting. Permissive parents are incredibly loving and responsive to their kids’ feelings.

However, they tend to avoid setting and enforcing boundaries. One of the most accurate ways of describing the style is that these parents often think of themselves as their children’s friends, rather than guardian figures. They pretty much let their munchkins do whatever they want without wanting to control them in any way. But kids need some sort of structure to thrive.

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Lastly, there’s the neglectful (aka uninvolved) parenting style where there are no rules, expectations, or support. The parents, for whatever reasons, simply do not respond to what they require, from basic needs to attention and love. Kids who grow up this way tend to have lots of problems at school, have little self-control, and may get in trouble with the authorities.

Out of all four of these styles, authoritative parenting is the only one that finds a balance between structure and encouragement. 

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Which of the parenting opinions in this list did you agree with the most? What parenting style and philosophy do you apply at home, dear Pandas? What advice would you give new parents who are struggling to juggle work, childcare, chores, and rest? We’d love to hear your thoughts, so if you have a moment, scroll down to the comment section to share them.

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